The thing that is scary dating taught me personally about rape tradition

The thing that is scary dating taught me personally about rape tradition

Chad* and I also came across on Bumble. We didn’t content one another for too much time before agreeing to generally meet for a romantic date, and I also traded within my typical pre-screening for the excitement of spontaneity. I’m a tad bit of a traditionalist, then when he advised we’ve dinner and not simply products, We had hope. He made reservations at an upscale BBQ restaurant (we reside in NYC, to make certain that’s a thing) and upon fulfilling him we instantly decided he had been precious, good, and a conversationalist that is good. Which can be quite difficult related to first-date jitters plus the anticipation of actually good mac and cheese.

We talked about our hometowns, our “favorites,” and our house. Then subject of work came up, and we told him we had been a journalist. This appeared to please him.

“i really could never date a female whom works in typically industries that are male-dominated law or medicine,” he uttered matter-of-factly.

We took a lengthy drink from my beverage, smiling in to the cup rim, keeping straight straight straight back the spoken whiplash i desired to impose on him. The gulp didn’t final long enough. The cup is put by me down.

“Is that because dating such a female is excessively for your delicate male ego?” I blurted down.

“It’s my preference,” he stated coolly, like we had been debating whether he preferred ladies who are athletic to ladies who are to the arts, not just a dating choice that screamed i love my women subordinate.

To a lot of, Chad’s “preference” seems like simply that — a choice. But if you ask me, it absolutely was a red flag that is glaring. He really told us to my face he required energy over their wife that is future slippery-slope of the mind-set that feeds into and it is a prelude if you commit intimate attack and harassment. I’d anticipate this sort of mindset from a Twitter troll, yet not from a adult man that is seemingly cultured. (more…)

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